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The Holy Name of Jesus

January 1, 2020

15When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let us go now to Bethlehem and see this thing that has taken place, which the Lord has made known to us.” 16So they went with haste and found Mary and Joseph, and the child lying in the manger. 17When they saw this, they made known what had been told them about this child; 18and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds told them. 19But Mary treasured all these words and pondered them in her heart. 20The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all they had heard and seen, as it had been told them. 21After eight days had passed, it was time to circumcise the child; and he was called Jesus, the name given by the angel before he was conceived in the womb.

Luke 2:15-21

Did you know that a holiday called The Holy Name of Jesus is a thing? I did not know it was a thing. It is, according to Wikipedia, mostly a Catholic thing, though John Calvin and Martin Luther both believed calling upon and glorifying Jesus’ name was an important devotional practice. I assume they don’t mean shouting, “Jesus Christ!” when you see that your child has turned her oatmeal into some sort of shampoo-facial mask combo.

But seriously, names are important. I’m sure we all remember the process of choosing our children’s names. For us, it was a combination of obsessive list-making and pure instinct. I gathered names in a note on my phone and once a week, Greg and I would comb through it and give each name a thumbs-up or thumbs-down. I deleted the rejected names from the note. As you might imagine, this was an imperfect process; Poppy made it onto the list probably a dozen or so times because I forgot we’d already rejected it.

By our baby shower at 36 weeks, we had zeroed in on Phoebe, Daisy, and Harriet as our three options. We received a daisy plant as a gift and thought Daisy was meant to be. When the plant withered and died in three days, we had no choice but to nix the name. Harriet didn’t quite feel right, but we didn’t feel like we could decide before we met her. After 30 hours of labor, two hours of pushing, a squirmy little alien on my chest, and a nurse asking us if we had a name picked out. We looked at each other, looked at this creature we somehow created, and said in unison, “Phoebe.” Phoebe was the first female deacon in the New Testament and it fit my personal criteria of being unique enough to not hit the top 100, but easily recognizable as a name. Now, almost 17 months later, I can’t picture her as anyone else. She is Phoebe; Phoebe is her. And naming her made us feel like we knew her, though we were just discovering who she was. She wasn’t “little nugget” or “baby girl” or any of the other generic things we’d been calling her, she was Phoebe: strong and spirited, loud and silly, known and loved.

I wonder how Mary felt, holding this baby in her arms that she’d carried in her body for months, calling him by his name. I wonder how Joseph felt, faced with this extraordinary surprise. I wonder how God felt.

This eighth day of Christmas is also New Year’s Day, and the first day of a brand-new decade. As fresh as a newborn baby. What do you want to name, create, and give voice to in the decade to come?

Epiphany

January 6, 2020

In the time of King Herod, after Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea, wise men from the East came to Jerusalem, 2asking, “Where is the child who has been born king of the Jews? For we observed his star at its rising, and have come to pay him homage.” 3When King Herod heard this, he was frightened, and all Jerusalem with him; 4and calling together all the chief priests and scribes of the people, he inquired of them where the Messiah was to be born. 5They told him, “In Bethlehem of Judea; for so it has been written by the prophet: 6‘And you, Bethlehem, in the land of Judah, are by no means least among the rulers of Judah; for from you shall come a ruler who is to shepherd my people Israel.’” 7Then Herod secretly called for the wise men and learned from them the exact time when the star had appeared. 8Then he sent them to Bethlehem, saying, “Go and search diligently for the child; and when you have found him, bring me word so that I may also go and pay him homage.”

9When they had heard the king, they set out; and there, ahead of them, went the star that they had seen at its rising, until it stopped over the place where the child was. 10When they saw that the star had stopped, they were overwhelmed with joy. 11On entering the house, they saw the child with Mary his mother; and they knelt down and paid him homage. Then, opening their treasure chests, they offered him gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh. 12And having been warned in a dream not to return to Herod, they left for their own country by another road.

Matthew 2:1-12

Baby gifts are so much fun. There’s nothing better, for me, than wandering the baby section at Target choosing what to send off to a set of new parents and their bundle of joy. We received an overwhelming abundance of baby gifts, from showers thrown by friends and my congregation and my husband’s workplace and the church staff. Handmade blankets, thoughtfully-chosen books, adorable clothes, all of it was not only practical, but profoundly representative of the village that is helping us to raise our daughter.

In reflecting on that time in our lives, though – the tender postpartum sleepless wondrous discovery time – the greatest gift people gave us were their questions.

I remember a dear friend visiting us in the hospital and asking, “How was your birth experience? I would love to hear as much about it as you’re ready to share or want to process.” Getting to tell my version of our birth story and for Greg to tell his too was a moment when we felt so seen and loved.

My colleague Adam came over a week after Phoebe’s birth and asked us, “What do you know about her so far?” This question treated us like the experts on our kid, which of course, we were, though we felt completely out of our depth. It invited us to claim an identity we were still figuring out how to live into.

A seminary friend came to visit during my maternity leave, when Phoebe was somewhere around 7 weeks old and experiencing serious colic. She asked me, “How is your spirit?” I had no idea how much I needed someone to acknowledge how hard this stage of newborn parenting was until she asked that question.

I am in Arizona right now experiencing the joy and power of the UCC’s Next Generation Leadership Initiative program, and a fellow toddler parent asked me during a dip in the pool, “How has becoming a parent changed your theology?” What an opening that honored our shared identities as pastors and parents and invited me into a different type of reflective space.

The Wise Ones brought gifts to Jesus that were so far from practical. Gold, frankincense, and myrrh were symbolic and beautiful and special, not the functional stuff of the everyday. This Epiphany, I am thinking about the amazing gift of these questions that get beyond the practical (“How is she sleeping?” “What are you doing to take care of yourself right now?”) to the symbolic and beautiful and special (“Who are you and who are you becoming?” “How is your soul?”). Parenting can feel so very functional much of the time. By asking one another questions that matter, we give a priceless gift.

The Second Sunday after Christmas

January 5, 2020

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2He was in the beginning with God. 3All things came into being through him, and without him not one thing came into being. What has come into being 4in him was life, and the life was the light of all people.

5The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not overcome it. 6There was a man sent from God, whose name was John. 7He came as a witness to testify to the light, so that all might believe through him. 8He himself was not the light, but he came to testify to the light. 9The true light, which enlightens everyone, was coming into the world. 10He was in the world, and the world came into being through him; yet the world did not know him. 11He came to what was his own, and his own people did not accept him. 12But to all who received him, who believed in his name, he gave power to become children of God, 13who were born, not of blood or of the will of the flesh or of the will of man, but of God. 14And the Word became flesh and lived among us, and we have seen his glory, the glory as of a father’s only son, full of grace and truth.

15(John testified to him and cried out, “This was he of whom I said, ‘He who comes after me ranks ahead of me because he was before me.’”) 16From his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace. 17The law indeed was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. 18No one has ever seen God. It is God the only Son, who is close to the Father’s heart, who has made him known.

John 1:1-18

Despite the problematic light-dark imagery and the problematic father-son gendered God language in this passage, it’s one of my favorites in all of scripture. I think it’s because it gets at the co-creative relationship that the birth of Jesus signifies. Word becomes flesh. Word becomes life. Word becomes grace and truth.

Right now, my daughter is having a language explosion. “Dog” is her favorite word, closely followed by “More,” equally likely to appear when requesting an eighth helping of Cheerios as it is when she wants to hear The Wheels on the Bus for the zillionth time. Hearing her say “Thank You” to her grandma when she cleans applesauce off her face is such a joy. The ability to use words to communicate successfully has signified an enormous change in our relationship. She can try to tell us, her parents, what she wants and what she’s thinking. I’ve heard from speech-language pathologist friends that it’s so important for nonverbal kids to have a mode of communication, whether it’s signs or a tablet or another assistive device, and in this phase of Phoebe’s life I can really understand why that’s true. Words offer us a modicum of control over our world. They allow us to connect with one another and express ourselves.

In thinking about Jesus as the Word, I think about his role as a kind of assistive device, helping us communicate more effectively with God. I understand the incarnation, Jesus’ life, as God putting on a body to experience all the joy and pain of human life. With that in mind, I feel much freer expressing my true inner life in prayer, knowing that God gets it.

Of course, any communication can be frustrating. My daughter often signs and says “More” over and over again and I have no idea what she wants more of. I beg God for answers and feel like I’m coming up empty. But these co-creative relationships, ours with God and ours with our children, feel like promises. Promises to keep trying, to come back together, to never give up in our quest to be understood. The reminder of how good it feels to be understood helps me have some patience with my kiddo as she tries so hard to tell me what she means.

I realize communication with your child is a rollercoaster. It might get easier for a while, as she acquires more language and we work on that huge emotional intelligence skill of naming feelings. But I know it will get harder as she goes through her own process of differentiation, asserting herself as an independent person, testing limits and holding her parents at arms’ length. I hope to lay the groundwork in these early years to reassure her that even though I may not always understand her, I’m in it with her.

Welcome!

Hey there! My name is Corinne Freedman Ellis. I’m a Rev. as of September 2014 and a parent as of August 2018. I don’t pretend to be an expert at either one, but I enjoy both very much! I serve as Minister of Congregational Life at Macalester Plymouth United Church in St. Paul, MN. My ministry involves creative worship planning, organizing for justice, walking with people through the ups and downs of life, and working with our junior high and high schoolers. I love it so much and feel really, really fortunate to get to do all of this and more as my job! On the home front, Greg is my spouse and co-parent extraordinaire, and in addition to Phoebe the toddler, we parent Vinnie the elderly Italian Greyhound.

With a busy toddler and a fulfilling call, why am I blogging about parenting and the lectionary?

  • Because reading the Bible is all about interpretation, and our lived experience is part of that interpretation.
  • Because my lived experience is SO heavy on parenting right now, so when I read scripture, I automatically use that lens.
  • Because while I have a pulpit, I am sensitive to the fact that my ministry is with people of all ages and stages, and parenting isn’t the only (or primary) topic I should be talking about in that context.
  • Because I think I’m a better pastor when I’m reading scripture regularly, and I think I’m a better parent when I’m reflecting on my experiences.
  • Because I am hungry for progressive Christian parenting community, and I hope this might spark some connection!

You may be wondering, what is the lectionary? Many Christian denominations, including Catholics, Episcopalians, Lutherans, Methodists, Presbyterians, UCC-ers, and others, use the Revised Common Lectionary to choose what scripture passages we read together in worship. The readings come in a 3-year rotation and don’t include everything from scripture, but they offer a wide range. Each week, the lectionary offers 4 readings: Hebrew Bible, Psalm, Gospel, and Epistle. I choose one to reflect on each week. The compilers of the Revised Common Lectionary were very thoughtful about the way the four readings relate to one another and how they fit into the broader church calendar. I aspire to one day reflect on all four, but one feels like plenty for now! This is a great resource to learn more about the Revised Common Lectionary and other cycles of readings.

From the parenting side of things, I don’t full-on subscribe to any single philosophy because I believe every kid teaches us how they need to be parented. That said, I love the framework of respectful parenting and find the resources of RIE Parenting to be especially helpful. Janet Lansbury’s Unruffled Podcast is awesome too. As with any challenging endeavor, I believe parenting happens best in community. Minnesota’s Early Childhood Family Education (ECFE) program has been invaluable for us!